i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
