sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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