I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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