you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
