Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
