worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
