Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
