What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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