I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
