He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
