Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
