He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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