so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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