so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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