Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
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