you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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