break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
