Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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