hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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