so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
