How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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