the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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