dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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