who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
