I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
