One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Everclear isn't food dammit
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
