quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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