Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
nutella sex= disaster
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
