i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize