And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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