i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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