hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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