Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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