lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
