Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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