I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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