glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
