My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
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