Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
