he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
