he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
