Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
