Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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