Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
