i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
