i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
