So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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