Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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