I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
