And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
